Sunday, March 17, 2013

Lowa Uplander Boot Review

Our friends over at Breach Bang Clear had a great review on the Lowa Uplander Boot. Lowa is world re-knowned for their high quality boots and have designs for all walks of life. The Uplander are certainly one of their more versatile design. You can get started with the review below from Jake "Slim" Call of the Mad Duo presented in a fashion only he would be able to pull off. 

Lowa Uplander Boots
Generally I won’t wear another man’s boots. It’s weird, creepy and even a little bit gross. Not that much grosses ole’ Slim out, Hell one time I waded thru a ditch full of human shit to avoid enemy fire, but hey we all got our limits. Anyway, Swinging Dick has been on my ass about trying these Lowa boots out for some time now. We have a bunch of SF buddies that rave about them, but the price has always turned me away.  Its not like servicemen make a boat load of money, like most public servants’ outside of Washington. I asked Nancy Pelosi to spare some cash to get my team some new kicks, but I guess she’s saving that 80 million for retirement. 

BBC: Lowa Boot Review
Buying an expensive pair of boots that don’t work out is a real kick in the nuts. I got pair of the USMC approved Danners once, and they didn’t work out. They fit well, they were made well, and they were comfortable. Unfortunately, the military sole was slicker than goose shit on anything wet. Rock, tile floors, skulls, everything. So I gave them to a buddy, who promptly began to bitch about the same problem.  Long story short, Swingin’ Dick finally gave me a pair of Lowa Uplanders to try out. After hosing out the smell of rotting corpses with a gallon of Lysol, I was ready to try the otherwise new boots out for a bit. 

The day I laced them on, I knew there was no going back. It was like Odin himself had cobbled these boots together by candle light in the halls of Valhalla, just for my feet!

Breach Bang Clear Boot Review
Ol’ Slim here has humped a metric shit-ton of miles in substandard boots. Climbed hundreds of mountains, trampled dozens of weak bastards sucking in their dying breath- all in shitty boots. Because once you lace a pair of these clodhoppers on, you realize ALL OTHER BOOTS are a waste of damn time. They all suck, every single other pair you have ever worn in your entire life. If you are ever smart or lucky enough to find yourself in a pair, I’m sure you will say the same! Kilgore and myself have worn boots for a living our entire adult lives. Hell, I started wearing Jungles like a motard boot when I was just a kid.  They have always been my favorite, and the standard all other boots are judged. The old Black jungle boots (and the CTAP issue desert equivalent) were the best. Like tennis shoes with a monster truck tread, light and flexible. Running wasn’t an issue at all. Then our beloved Corps went and screwed us all with heavy crap boots with bullshit soles and cheap stitching. No surprise there.

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